You Might Be a Stingy Sailor

Comedian Jeff Foxworthy has made a fortune with his redneck jokes about “the glorious absence of sophistication.” They also poke fun at a particular socio-economic class in our culture. Yes, they’re corny but they’re also funny because many of us can see a bit of ourselves or somebody we know in them.

There are distinct socio-economic classes in sailing culture too. This web site is specifically tailored for one of them so, just for fun, here’s my version with a stingy sailor twist. Please don’t be offended by them and write to me to call me a sailing bigot. I count myself as squarely in the middle of the pack. If you can think of a good one, add it to the comments below.

If you think “Do it yourself” is the eleventh commandment…you might be a stingy sailor.

If you make your own teabags out of old sails…you might be a stingy sailor.

If you’ve used more duct tape on your sailboat than rigging tape…you might be a stingy sailor.

If the head in your sailboat can also be used to bail water…you might be a stingy sailor.

If you’ve ever used a tarp as a boom tent and as a mainsail…you might be a stingy sailor.

If your fenders are trailer tire inner tubes and also your backup plan in case of a flat tire…you might be a stingy sailor.

If your outboard motor is a salvaged boat anchor…you might be a stingy sailor.

If you make your morning coffee with yesterday’s coffee grounds over a can of Sterno…you might be a stingy sailor.

If the tiller on your sailboat used to be a yard tool…you might be a stingy sailor.

If you check your email inbox every Saturday morning for the latest post on The $tingy Sailor…you might be a stingy sailor.

If you conclude that you are, in fact, a stingy sailor and you’re proud of it, why not show it with a stingy sailor T-shirt?


4 Comments Add yours

  1. Ron Leo says:


    How are you coming on your pop-top-gas shock mod?

    Been keeping a lookout for it, going to tackle my 84 C22 in March…

    Thx in advance and keep up your great work!!!


    Ron Leo

    (formerly in Victor, NY, now is New Bern, NC – (much better sailing environment!)

    1. Hi, Ron

      It’s high on my to-do list. I just moved to a better sailing environment myself and it set some of my projects back a bit. And I don’t have a barn to work in during winter anymore. Stay tuned, it’s coming!


  2. Ethan Carlton Atkinson says:

    If your sail is a few pieces of canvas and 3 rolls of sail tape….
    you may be a stingy sailor.

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